Monday, March 30, 2009

This time, I'm not speechless

Prepare for a "The black helicopters are circling my house!" rant. I'm miffed.

Unlike the government's actions with the Wizards of Wall Street, the Dumbasses of Detroit must offer a political sacrifice (link via Drudge) before they can receive a bailout from The Obama. I guess forcing them crawl before Congress just wasn't enough to convince The One that they were worthy. Perhaps if the broken glass had been freshly salted it would have been enough. Oh well, too late now.

"What we are asking is difficult," he said. "It will require hard choices by companies. It will require unions and workers who have already made painful concessions to make even more. It will require creditors to recognize that they cannot hold out for the prospect of endless government bailouts."

Yeah, GM, you're no AIG. No endless government teet for you!

We should also note that the new head of GM, Fritz Henderson, is a long time GM employee. More Change, I guess. Let's get rid of one GM guy that couldn't make it work (although, in fairness, he inherited a lot of the problems) and replace him with...another GM guy. What strategy--man, that Obama can really make those hard choices!

A lesser-reported move is a wholesale replacement of GM's board of directors. I guess more blood was needed.

Chrysler can take heart, as they weren't forgotten in the auto industry bailout plan. If they will just merge with Fiat, they can get some bailout money too! Whoopee! We can bailout an American automaker and an Italian one at the same time. Who needs Tony to fix things--we have Obama!

I wouldn't plan on buying a vehicle from GM or Chrysler. This is just the camel's nose (well, maybe the head and neck) under the tent. Soon, in order to keep getting that government largess that Detroit will soon be hooked on, (Hey kid, try this! First one's free!) the automakers will be changing their product lineup at the behest of their financiers. Your only choices from Detroit will be nicely "green" with 85 MPH speedometers and 55 MPH governors. And you can have it in any color you want--as long as it's Deficit Red or Democrat Blue. Never mind that black box in the engine compartment--it's for the children your own good. No, you don't need to know what it does--just make sure you have your credit card on file so we can bill you for your mileage tax. And why were you at the Quickie Mart at 2:15 AM Sunday morning?

For extra sleepless nights, consider the mandates to only buy materials and parts from certain vendors--you know, ones with unionized workforces, a proper multicultural pedigree and an appropriate history of correct campaign contributions. Boy, we can really help out our friends now. We'll be in power forever!

And you all thought that Congressional Motors was just a joke.

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